i love accidental penises.
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
Happy hour crawl turned into power happy hour turned into tequila shots turned into I'm drunk in class on Cinco de Mayo at 7 am.
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
Randomize