i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
Someone puked in my crockpot. Your friends can’t come over any more.
Learned two new lessons today: 1) Do not identify pills found in one's car by taking them to see what happens, especially while at work, and 2) There is no logical reason to keep ambien in one's vehicle...
Randomize