Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
I can't turn off my feet"
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
She stripped naked and ran around the outside of the house while I stood by the tent holding her clothes shouting "come back" because I was too drunk to chase her. This is why we can't have nice things.
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
Randomize