he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
This guy on Hoarders just said "we're all about 4 or 5 decisions away from shitting in a bucket". True dat
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
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