i'm chasing tequila w mint flavored ice cream, phil's chasing it w cream cheese, bashar's chasing it w pickles...i think we all know who the winner is....
we're chasing vodka with high fives
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
Randomize