I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT