probably shouldnt have written that paper while wasted, its starts with once upon a time
i tried to stop you but you kept shouting "two birds with one stone!"
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
I'm alittle affraid you might be dead, seeing how your work party is in an hour and you haven't answered me? I mean I'm picturing you 1. Passed out in your car covered in fries or 2. On a boat in a box to Mexico covered in coke. Please let it be number 1. And aren't we going to your work party?
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
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