Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
Randomize
