come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
Randomize
