Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
New invention idea: vibrating tampons
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
Hurry up. We're trading phones to prevent drunk texting.
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Justin Timberlake, while dressed as Britney Spears. Fuck Jessica Biel, all my 90's dreams are coming true.
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
Randomize