i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
Fucked Zombie Jesus at a Halloween party. I need Plan B before I give birth to the Antichrist.
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
Randomize
