is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
this is a save-me-from-tijuana-tequila-and-hoookers booty call. if i don't hear from you by 8pm i'm grabbing my passport
if i'm not back tomorrow call the embassy
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