Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
Just taking a shit and realized the captain planet theme song is stuck in my head.
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
Randomize
