whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
My roommate taped his phone to the ceiling fan to simulate walking so he could hatch Pokémon. Lazy people will always find a way.
I've never seen anyone as high as you were.. you collapsed onto the kitchen floor hugging a tub of ice cream. You named it phil.
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
Randomize
