So... My dad just saw the Plan B package and the beer cans in my backseat.
Oh its cool I'm sure he already knows you're a whore and an alcoholic.
So thanks to the xanax and vodka memory erasering combo i wake up only to reopen a picture of some very familiar balls
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
I like being woken up by phone calls of you sabotaging marriages
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
Randomize