If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
i just opened a bottle of wine with my dads power tools
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
Randomize
