champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
Randomize
