accomplished twins. life is a go
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
I folded my dollar bills into mustaches in preparation for our trip to the strip club
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
It's almost 5am and all I can keep thinking is IT'S WHISKEY TIME!!
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
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