Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
this just has baby written all over it
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
Randomize