I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
So i banged this chick from Peru last night. Needless to say, I'm having chipotle for lunch todayas a south American reward to honor her.
Just got a full body massage. It was uncomfortable at first, but then I realized I let strangers turn off the lights and put their hands all over my naked body 3 times a week anyways.
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
I'm armed with nothing but $4 lip gloss gum and my phone. Ready to take on the fucking world.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
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