P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
at one point last night, you were literally auctioning me off. "reeeally drunk hot girl ! we'll start the bidding at an ice cold corona. oh, we have a bidder! do i hear a shot of whiskey? going once, going twice.."
youre welcome
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hid my booze in my old Sesame Street lunch box. Big Bird might be disappointed, but I feel Oscar the Grouch would approve.
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
Im just a social blackout drinker.
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Randomize