She just texted me saying, "I wish you were a better person so I could fuck you without regrets"
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just had that moment when you realize the two drunk women shoving all their money down your clothes were your middle school teachers...
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
I like being woken up by phone calls of you sabotaging marriages
Randomize