There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
Just heard the garage door open and I immediately sprinted to the laptop to erase history, even though I haven't watched porn today...I believe Pavlov now.
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
Do you remember calling yourself Captain Cockblock and openly giving out everyones sexual history? Because you did.
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
Randomize