And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
Then you guys just all showered together...?
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
I think drunk me saved him in my phone as "beautiful man" to play a joke on sober me
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