Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
it's not cheating when I paid for it
My niece just threw up all over me. My sister's breastmilk was on my face. This is like a fucked-up porno gone terribly wrong.
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
PS: I just woke up from my shower
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
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