For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
have you seen my purse? i cant find it and my ipod is in there and that shit totally cost more than my abortion.
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
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