I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
Randomize
