bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My balls are so social today.
I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
Bring a bathing suit and your good liver.
My good liver is still at the dry cleaners. Will my backup liver suffice?
Maybe
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
I need mimosas to revive my soul
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
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