Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
I'm done being subtle here. MOVE INTO MY EXTRA BEDROOM SO WE CAN FUCK WHENEVER AND NOT HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT FINDING PEOPLE TO HAVE CASUAL SEX WITH.
you live like 200 miles from me and I have two years of school left
goddamnit stop pointing out all the flaws in my plan
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Randomize
