well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
Randomize
