i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
I want you to know I am at work super hungover and I threw up in the mop sink. I feel like you will appreciate this
You're my fucking hero
The cop asked me why my pants were around my knees when he woke me from the sink, i replied "Officer, my underwear is still on, nothing bad happened" then he nodded in acknowledgement and we carried on with the paper work.
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