I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
The awkward moment when you're leaving the most attractive guy you've ever been with and you're trying not to shit on yourself. Fucking welcome to my life
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
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