I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
I IMAGINED YOU YELLING SURPRISE WITH JAZZ HANDS. AND I LOVE YOU FOREVER
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
If you're going to drink sriracha straight from the bottle whilst crying, at least wear the giant sombrero for the enjoyment of your audience.
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
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