i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
He just asked for the blowjob I promised him 3 years ago that he'd get the next time Michigan beat Ohio State. Goddamnit.
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Randomize
