Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
Somehow ended up home, probably had something to do with the makeshift ladder from my second story window. Now headed to church, still drunk, and still fighting back the vomit of a thousand different alcohols. Successful night.
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
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