a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
There's an old bald Japanese dude on the metra next to me. He's drinking MGD on a crowded train, and rocking out way too hard to what may be the same Dallas Green song I'm listening to. Life is sweet.
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
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