It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
You tried to tell her that the salad was an afrodisiac then proceeded to stroke yourself with the feather duster
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
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