And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
Dude you need to stop whoring out my boobs. They are for emergencies only.
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
We need a shit load of segways right now
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
Randomize
