Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
you're close to getting here right? Because if you're still not here and I have to get dressed to answer the door for the pizza guy, i'm tipping him $100 on your credit card to spite you
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
Randomize
