I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
I'm at McDonalds and when I walked up to the register the guy said "I'm so sorry." Before I said a word. That's how bad my hangover is.
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
I sent her a dick pic and used brett Favre's dick pick. She asked me why I had pictures of old men's dicks saved on my phone... I just can't win bro
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
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