drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
Drunk me thinks I can light up a cig anywhere, sober me finds this hilarious and highly irresponsible. The grocery store is not a bar.
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
Randomize