Oscar is the man. He keeps getting pictures of hot nude women with messages in spanish saying "i hope you like it" sent to his phone
whose oscar?
the baller who i guess decided to give out a fake number at the bar last weekend. luckily that fake number was mine. i have enough porn to last me until next month.
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
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