I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
one of my coworkers asked me if I was PMSing today...... excuse me sir, but it is none of your business as to what my uterus is or is not doing right now. fucker.
and yea, I'm PMSing.
Randomize
