and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
Here’s Why Hotel Photos On Travel Websites Are A Complete Hoax
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
It was awkward being the only one at the wedding who knows that the bride and groom met when she gave him a lap dance at a strip club
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
A Guy Sent A Woman What May Be The Craziest Breakup Text Ever
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
What would you do if your asshole suddenly made the sound of a sheep duck baa/quacking the words kill me
You are so incredibly one of a kind, it's astounding
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.