Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
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