so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
I need a $60 an hour job, because I have a $50 an hour drinking habit.
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
He fell asleep and I'm awkwardly laying here because all I have to wear is my tutu. I'm pretty sure his roommate is going to be back soon so this should be fun. This is my life now. PS. the background of his phone is a picture of his hedgehog.
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Randomize
