my soul wont recognize me after tonight
Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
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