Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
Randomize
