This house was built for laser tag.
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
He’s actually a personal trainer. He said he hasn’t taught yoga in a while but the stripper prefers to introduce him as a yoga teacher
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
Randomize
