So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
I wanted to take a shower but I forgot we made applesauce in it last night.
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
In honor of the new administration, I'm going to make it my goal this weekend to get some lesbian action. Fuck Donald Trump and fuck Mike Pence. I'm going to be a spiteful gay.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
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