Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
Julian told me all the fish in his pond died and he didn't know when or how. I didn't have the heart to tell him he drunkenly peed in the pond on Saturday as everyone cheered him on.
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Randomize